Stranger Things: Walking Pilgrimage and Self-Discovery
My confession is that I’ve not watched ‘Stranger Things’ on Netflix. But I recently heard Robert De Niro say good things about it on a podcast. His daughter had got him into watching it and that lovely image got my attention. I’m told that the sci-fi/horror/drama is set in the ‘80s, that was my era of growing up. But rather than trust in any strangers with psychokinetic powers, I was taught about ‘stranger danger’. I’m one of a generation who were told not to talk to, accept things from, or go anywhere with people they didn’t know!
‘Stranger Danger’ was a well-intended campaign slogan, though it didn’t serve us particularly well for two reasons: the harm most children experienced came from people they did know, and it may have stopped children from asking for help from strangers who could have helped in various situations.
Strangers are rarely to be feared, they are simply people we don’t yet know. They, (and we are all ‘they’ at some point in our lives), are to be welcomed and hosted and connected with. The book of Hebrews in the Bible reminds us not to forget to show hospitality to strangers, for by so doing some people have shown hospitality to angels without knowing it (Hebrews 13:2). Angels of course are a whole other blog topic!
And here’s the thing, maybe the stranger thing. The spiritual practice of pilgrimage has stranger identity at its heart. I remember walking out of Oviedo that first morning of the Camino Primitivo. It was early, not yet fully light. I was walking through a Plaza. Almost the only person there. There was one other, he was still inebriated from the night before. I felt a little wary. From across the square he shouted at me: “Hey, Peregrina!” Peregrina translates as pilgrim! From initially being startled it became a lovely moment for me. I’d looked over my shoulder to see who else was around and then realised he was referring to me! I was the Peregrina, which also meant that to him, I was the stranger.
Walking pilgrimage: Becoming less of a stranger to yourself
The word pilgrimage comes from the Latin peregrinus, meaning a foreigner, stranger or traveller in foreign lands: someone wandering through a place that is strange to them. The strangeness is reciprocal. And it goes so much farther than the outer journey. By going on pilgrimage we often fall into step with other strangers. And we may even discover that we are something of a stranger to ourselves. Or for some folks, the choice to go on pilgrimage is because they have noticed that they are something of a stranger to themselves, and they wish to go on a journey of self-discovery. They wish to quieten the noise of distractions and attend to who they are under all the busyness. What will be uncovered when all the complexity of life is stripped back? And what will be made different by that discovery, on their return?
One of the other wonderful things about pilgrimage is the people and creatures you meet along the way. Even if these are often brief interactions with relative strangers, they are often encounters that help us notice and attend to what truly matters. And as we've said in a previous blog, a journey of self-discovery, or becoming less of a stranger to ourselves, is very hard, if not impossible, to make on our own. The wisdom of a trusted companion helps. And the objectivity of a relative stranger may help even more.
And that’s where spiritual direction can come in. Let's face it: a spiritual director is a relative stranger. And that's no bad thing. It is often much easier to confide in a relative stranger. It can be easier to have what you say, or how you are holding yourself, reflected back to you by someone who doesn’t know you very well. The stranger may be better placed to help facilitate and deepen our own noticing. A certain distance gives them the objectivity to help us develop our own discernment.
Wendell Berry, recently deceased, reminds us that ‘The world cannot be discovered by a journey of miles, no matter how long, but only by a spiritual journey, a journey of one inch, very arduous and humbling and joyful, by which we arrive at the ground at our own feet and learn to be at home.’
The pilgrimage of becoming less of a stranger to ourselves is deep and holy work. It can be hard, and it is deeply joyful. We are available and would love to be your companion, your stranger, on the way. To facilitate your own noticing, even of the stranger things. Do get in touch to explore possibilities, whether or not you are planning a literal pilgrimage journey.
Are you thinking about making a walking pilgrimage?
We're delivering a short series of sessions about preparing well for the journey, practically and spiritually for beginners or those with a little experience. That might include choosing between a one-day or longer walking pilgrimage, walking in the UK or overseas, going alone or with a guide, and how to prepare inwardly as well as physically.
We’re still shaping it, so if this is something you’d be interested in, do send us a message through the contact page and tell us what you’d most like help with. We’d love the sessions to grow out of the questions you are actually asking.
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